Where does all the time in my week go?
I cannot believe how much I my home gets negelted each week.
Yesterday, it took me 2 1/2 hours to clean the basement.
But I am also in "Fall Cleaning" mode so that may be why too.
Today on my list is to get the laundry going and get the upstairs deep cleaned.
I know I will be doing this alone.
Not that I am complaining. I would rather do it myself.
I am one of those, if I do it myself, I know it will get done right type of people.
Plus, asking for help from dh is like trying to get a lion to become just a lap animal.
I have decided that I need to make better use of my time.
I know. I know.
I am almost 40 and just now having a revelation about how terrible I time manage.
With the new job I am starting when my other ends, I will be working Monday thru Friday 8 - 5 and I need to learn how to get my "wifely duties" done each evening so I can have my weekends to do whatever I feel like.
So I found this website a long time ago, http://www.avirtuouswoman.org .
It has a "household notebook" printouts, so I printed off the Daily Schedule and am going from there.
I figure if I make a Monday thru Friday schedule from after Jazzercise until I drop in bed, then I won't have so much to do on the weekends.
I am just tired of feeling like a woman with her hair on fire every Saturday and Sunday because nothing has been done all week.
I can spend my time on things I want to do and not need to do.
That of course means being horded away in my scrap room working on Jordan's pages before graduation in May.
That time will be here before I want too.
I have been wasting my time, when no one is coming in, at work on different scrapbooking and scrapbooker sites.
I found this daily blog question on the "Two Peas" scrapbooking message board this morning.
(I stay off the non-scrap related board. Those women are just out to eat each other alive!)
Since it is a "time" issue, I thought it went well with my post this morning.
Blog about 5 things you want to do before your time is up.
Could be anything.
Blog about those 5 things.
1. Grow way to old with my dear husband
2. See my son grow and prosper in his career and personal life.
3. See my daughter flurish and prosper in her career and personal life.
4. To meet all my grandchildren and possibly great grandchildren.
5. To leave happy memories with each and every person I meet in the time I have left.
Have a great day and go make the most of the time we have been blessed with.
Sunday, October 14, 2007
Sunday, September 23, 2007
The Cost of Dreaming
I was offered a job on Thursday.
To work for the same people I currently work for but only in their staffing company in the collection's area.
On Wednesday John and I went for a ride.
As we were riding around he asked if I wanted to buy this house.
It's the one my financial counselor friend thinks would make a perfect bed & breakfast.
You cannot see it thru the tree, but it's a beautiful old 3 story victorian style house.
I made the mistake of going and looking at it tonight.
Okay, it wasn't a bad mistake, but it awakened dreams again that I had decided to quit on.
Why am I quitting?
Because it is just my dream and my loving husband does not share in it.
As I wandered around the beauty of this house and talked with my girlfriend about how wonderful it would be to have and clean it up, fix it up and live in, I kept hearing "reality" in the corners of my mind.
My beautiful daughter has senior pictures, which are a big deal around here, in just 3 weeks.
We have Christmas is just a few months, about 90 days I think.
We are discussing going to Vegas for a short vacation after the first of 2008.
John wants to go to Europe for an extended vacation in 2008 and we need passports.
Jordan has to have some help with college where scholarships fall short.
This is why I work full time outside of my home. It has only ever been the only reason I work.
So my kids and I can have and do things. If I can't pay for it, forget it.
This is why my dreams take a back seat to real life.
John knew when he told me that I needed to have a job in place when this one ends because of Jordan going to college, he had crossed a line.
I told him that I did not plan on buying the house when we were driving around Wednesday evening so I can pay for Jordan's college expenses.
He asked if that made me mad when he said that and I said no, but that he did hurt my feelings.
So Thursday when I got offered the job opportunity to work with 6 other women in an office, I told John that I plan on accepting it, what ever it will involve.
At this point I have no idea how much I will be making.
What exactly I will be doing or what my hours will be.
I have many reservations about the job, but will do it without complaining because that is what I do.
I have raised my children to follow their dreams, so thru them I will be living mine, for they are my biggest dream made reality.
The ones in my heart will have to find a new place to hide.
To work for the same people I currently work for but only in their staffing company in the collection's area.
On Wednesday John and I went for a ride.
As we were riding around he asked if I wanted to buy this house.
It's the one my financial counselor friend thinks would make a perfect bed & breakfast.
You cannot see it thru the tree, but it's a beautiful old 3 story victorian style house.
I made the mistake of going and looking at it tonight.
Okay, it wasn't a bad mistake, but it awakened dreams again that I had decided to quit on.
Why am I quitting?
Because it is just my dream and my loving husband does not share in it.
As I wandered around the beauty of this house and talked with my girlfriend about how wonderful it would be to have and clean it up, fix it up and live in, I kept hearing "reality" in the corners of my mind.
My beautiful daughter has senior pictures, which are a big deal around here, in just 3 weeks.
We have Christmas is just a few months, about 90 days I think.
We are discussing going to Vegas for a short vacation after the first of 2008.
John wants to go to Europe for an extended vacation in 2008 and we need passports.
Jordan has to have some help with college where scholarships fall short.
This is why I work full time outside of my home. It has only ever been the only reason I work.
So my kids and I can have and do things. If I can't pay for it, forget it.
This is why my dreams take a back seat to real life.
John knew when he told me that I needed to have a job in place when this one ends because of Jordan going to college, he had crossed a line.
I told him that I did not plan on buying the house when we were driving around Wednesday evening so I can pay for Jordan's college expenses.
He asked if that made me mad when he said that and I said no, but that he did hurt my feelings.
So Thursday when I got offered the job opportunity to work with 6 other women in an office, I told John that I plan on accepting it, what ever it will involve.
At this point I have no idea how much I will be making.
What exactly I will be doing or what my hours will be.
I have many reservations about the job, but will do it without complaining because that is what I do.
I have raised my children to follow their dreams, so thru them I will be living mine, for they are my biggest dream made reality.
The ones in my heart will have to find a new place to hide.
Wednesday, September 19, 2007
Answered prayers????
For the last month I have probably known this was coming.
The lack of communication was the big key.
I am out of a job as of December 31st of 2007.
The people I work for have decided not to move forward with the MediFast corporation that Hi Energy is a sister company to.
I started about 4 weeks ago cruising the internet and just getting an idea in my head about starting a scrapbooking store in the town I live in.
I found a site that let me print off a free scrapbooking store sample business plan and have been carrying that around for a few weeks.
Last Wednesday I took a drive to my favorite scrapbooking store in the town that is 45 minutes away. I did this with no adjenda and not taking anything to scrap just to "check out the store".
I walked in and it was empty feeling.
You know that feeling of when something isn't going well and the product you see is from the last time you were there, which was months ago.
The lady working and I are friends so she tells me the two owners are in a battle because the one who wants out is asking way way more than what she has into the store and does not agree to the other's contract demands.
The owner wanting out offered it to the lady working, but had to turn her down because she is so over the top with what she wants.
I am not a religious freak by any means, but I believe when God places something so strongly in your heart that you cannot help but follow.
I also believe He gives you 3 signs.
My first sign was me even thinking about opening a scrapbooking store.
It was in my dreams for goodness sakes!
The second sign was me driving for absolutely no reason 45 minutes away and staying for 3 1/2 hours at the scrapbooking store without working on a thing.
I could have at least gotten on page done. ((wink))
My third sign came this morning at 10:04 when my boss laid it out like he always does.
"As of December 31st, Hi Energy will no longer exist."
I sit thru the 2 1/2 hour meeting discussing what to tell the clientel I have coming in right now and when.
How to handle the advertising and handling the hours, which we do appointments only so its not to hard to adjust that.
I will be the only one working after Sept 30th.
My boss let the older lady who works part-time and does her summer vacationing in South Dakota know today.
I get to talk with the other two who work tomorrow evening and inform them of the changes.
This brings me back to my answered prayers.
I knew this was the direction the business was taking. I just felt it.
I am burned out.
So, I go to my dear husbands place of employment and inform him of the decision that has been laid before me.
I finally tell him I want to have my own scrapbooking store.
He was supportive telling me to call this business group that helps you and to call our friend who is a financial planner.
So, I call my friend who is a financial planner.
First words out of her mouth; I don't know a store that has lasted longer than a year.
Keep in mind, she doesn't scrapbook either.
She tells me there is a really old house for sale and John and I should consider opening a Bed and Breakfast and I could have all night crops there and have a scrapbooking store there.
At least she got the store in.
I call dear husband after our conversation and I tell him what she said.
He said that maybe we should wait until Jordan is settled in college to do anything and I should just look for a job else where after the first of the year.
My heart sank.
I have been on such a high all day thinking that I would finally get to do something I have dreamed of doing for years.
No more sitting at work thinking and dreaming.
Now I don't know what to do other than to table my dream.
Put my notebook up on a shelf and wait until the time is right... again.
More than likely that is what I will do.
I will finish out my days at Hi Energy because I like the people I work for and then maybe get an over night job working at one of the hotels around here.
There are always ads in the paper for evening positions.
I have about 100 days to decide what I want to.
Until then, I will just keep praying.
The lack of communication was the big key.
I am out of a job as of December 31st of 2007.
The people I work for have decided not to move forward with the MediFast corporation that Hi Energy is a sister company to.
I started about 4 weeks ago cruising the internet and just getting an idea in my head about starting a scrapbooking store in the town I live in.
I found a site that let me print off a free scrapbooking store sample business plan and have been carrying that around for a few weeks.
Last Wednesday I took a drive to my favorite scrapbooking store in the town that is 45 minutes away. I did this with no adjenda and not taking anything to scrap just to "check out the store".
I walked in and it was empty feeling.
You know that feeling of when something isn't going well and the product you see is from the last time you were there, which was months ago.
The lady working and I are friends so she tells me the two owners are in a battle because the one who wants out is asking way way more than what she has into the store and does not agree to the other's contract demands.
The owner wanting out offered it to the lady working, but had to turn her down because she is so over the top with what she wants.
I am not a religious freak by any means, but I believe when God places something so strongly in your heart that you cannot help but follow.
I also believe He gives you 3 signs.
My first sign was me even thinking about opening a scrapbooking store.
It was in my dreams for goodness sakes!
The second sign was me driving for absolutely no reason 45 minutes away and staying for 3 1/2 hours at the scrapbooking store without working on a thing.
I could have at least gotten on page done. ((wink))
My third sign came this morning at 10:04 when my boss laid it out like he always does.
"As of December 31st, Hi Energy will no longer exist."
I sit thru the 2 1/2 hour meeting discussing what to tell the clientel I have coming in right now and when.
How to handle the advertising and handling the hours, which we do appointments only so its not to hard to adjust that.
I will be the only one working after Sept 30th.
My boss let the older lady who works part-time and does her summer vacationing in South Dakota know today.
I get to talk with the other two who work tomorrow evening and inform them of the changes.
This brings me back to my answered prayers.
I knew this was the direction the business was taking. I just felt it.
I am burned out.
So, I go to my dear husbands place of employment and inform him of the decision that has been laid before me.
I finally tell him I want to have my own scrapbooking store.
He was supportive telling me to call this business group that helps you and to call our friend who is a financial planner.
So, I call my friend who is a financial planner.
First words out of her mouth; I don't know a store that has lasted longer than a year.
Keep in mind, she doesn't scrapbook either.
She tells me there is a really old house for sale and John and I should consider opening a Bed and Breakfast and I could have all night crops there and have a scrapbooking store there.
At least she got the store in.
I call dear husband after our conversation and I tell him what she said.
He said that maybe we should wait until Jordan is settled in college to do anything and I should just look for a job else where after the first of the year.
My heart sank.
I have been on such a high all day thinking that I would finally get to do something I have dreamed of doing for years.
No more sitting at work thinking and dreaming.
Now I don't know what to do other than to table my dream.
Put my notebook up on a shelf and wait until the time is right... again.
More than likely that is what I will do.
I will finish out my days at Hi Energy because I like the people I work for and then maybe get an over night job working at one of the hotels around here.
There are always ads in the paper for evening positions.
I have about 100 days to decide what I want to.
Until then, I will just keep praying.
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